


infinite love without fulfillment

by starlorde



Category: Football RPF
Genre: M/M, Sergio has a child, the title is from a song by Grimes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-01
Updated: 2015-05-01
Packaged: 2018-03-26 12:31:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3851056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlorde/pseuds/starlorde
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No one asked, no one talked, because they already knew.</p>
            </blockquote>





	infinite love without fulfillment

**Author's Note:**

> i wanna say thanks to [gabiula](http://archiveofourown.org/users/gabiula) for giving me this idea, idk if it was what she meant but the idea was amazing, so thank you

Sergio doesn't blame her, no, of course not. It's not her fault, and it's not his fault either. This is not a mistake, a son is not a mistake, it's a gift, it's just not a gift that he wanted now, and not with her, just like she probably does not want this gift with him. They like each other, they just don't want to be together, and that's okay.

It's been two months since Sergio saw the mother of his son. Pilar left two weeks after Sergio Ramos Jr born. Sergio doesn't blame her, he just wishes she could see him growing up, and he wishes his son could have a mother. If one day she decide to come back to see her son, he would let. It's her right, and Sergio does not blame her for anything.

Have a son was nice, Sergio was really afraid of not being a good father, but it turned out that he is actually very good at this. Sergio smiles just to see his son's smile, he even not care of diaper changes anymore. He likes to sleep with Little Sergio by his side, to keep him always safe.

There's Iker, who always help Sergio with everything, especially with his son. After the trainings sessions, Iker always comes to Sergio's house to help him with his son and with other things he needs help for. Iker has been helping Sergio for so long. They're best friends, everybody knows that, they're always together, always side by side, hugging each other, kissing each other on the cheeks. They are Iker and Sergio, Sergio and Iker and they're always together, at their best and at their worst. They share tears and smiles. Now Iker helps Sergio with his son, with diaper changes, food, baths, clothes, Iker plays with Little Sergio a lot, and he loves Iker. No one thinks that is strange the fact that Iker got out of Sergio's car, holding Sergio's son on his hands. The squad knows. Sergio helps Iker too, with words mostly; when people judge Iker, telling him he's not the one to Real Madrid anymore, that he is old, he needs to retire soon, all of bad that happens to Real Madrid is his fault. Sergio is always there to tell him that those things are all lies, _''you are the best goalkeeper I have ever seen,'' ''you are Real Madrid and Real Madrid is you.''_ He says. Iker smiles and thanks him, then he hugs Sergio and thanks God for give him such an amazing friend like Sergio.

Sergio feel things for Iker, and everybody knows, except Iker. He knows that this is wrong, and he should not like Iker that way, but he can't help himself. Sergio is in love with Iker for so long, he already accepted the fact that it will never be real. They will always be together, but they will never be together. He feels guilty every time Iker hugs him tight and Sergio thinks about how would feel like to have Iker inside him, or when Iker kisses Sergio's cheeks and he imagine that he actually could turn his face and kiss Iker's lips instead of the cheeks, he could have said _''sorry I turned wrong.''_ They would laugh, and things would get confused and weird, but then the kiss would have been forgotten and everything would would go back to normal. Sergio is always straight and forward, but with his feelings for Iker, he deny everytime, even if everybody knows the truth. He loves Iker too much to ruin their friendship like that, specially now that Iker is happy to take care of his son, which makes Sergio sadder because in his dreams, Little Sergio is Iker's son too.

One night, Iker was at Sergio's house taking care of Little Sergio, making gestures with his hands so the baby could laugh, while Sergio was out talking to Perez, something about his renew contract. Iker had fed Sese, and now he was almost sleeping, so Iker putted him on the bed, and now he was watching Tv, seated on the couch, almost asleep when he heard Sergio's car entered the garage. Sergio entered the house after a couple of minutes and surprised himself at seeing that Iker still in his house.

''You didn't have to.'' He smiled a little. Iker nodded. ''There's no problem, I love your son and your house is like my second home, anyway.''

Iker got up. Sergio sits on the couch. ''Do you want a coffe or something?'' Sergio smiled and nodded in negative. Iker sits on the couch too then.

After several minutes of silence but the tv noise, Iker finally asked what had happened with the conversation with Perez. ''Nothing, I renewed my contract.'' Iker sighed. ''You don't seem very happy.'' Sergio looked at Iker, and his eyes were wet with tears rolling faster than a rocket ship. Sergio wanted to punch himself right now. _what an idiot_. Iker touched Sergio's face with his hands. ''Hey, what is going on?'' Iker was confused and surprise, the last time he saw his friend cry was when Little Sergio born, he was so happy and bright at that time, telling Iker that his son is beautiful, he was crying happiness. He does not look very happy right now, he looked very sad and Iker has no idea why, and why had him stopped smiling at the trainings sessions, and why has him stopped kiss Iker on the cheeks in the tunnel before matches, like he always did, like they always did.

Iker waited to Sergio answer his question, but he didn't, he was not even looking at Iker anymore, Sergio was looking at the ground, like if he was lost. So Iker did the only thing he could do, the only thing he always do. He hugged Sergio tight, but Sergio pulled Iker's arms off him.''Please, no, you don't have to.'' Iker does not understand what Sergio was saying, because of course he has to hugs him, _he loves him_ , but Sergio was still talking. ''And you don't have to come here everyday to take care of my son, he's my problem, not yours. I can take care of him.'' He said these things looking at the wall behind the tv. ''I...I think you should go now.'' Iker tried to say something, but Sergio was already up stairs when he found words. Tears rolled in Iker's face, but all he could do right now was move forward. Out of the house.

Sergio was in his bed, crying for what he had done and crying for what he haven't done.

Several days had passed, and Iker still does not understands why Sergio had stopped talking to him. _He noticed_. Iker thought. Their teammates didn't say anything, they didn't talk a thing about it, like if Iker was the only one here that didn't know why. He missed Little Sergio so much that hurts, and he feels that everyday that Sergio is not there to him is a waste.

Iker heard a lot of stories, most of them very funny. But also he remembered in the middle of his laugh, he wanted to tell this story to Sergio. He thought that when the time passed, he thought that when he finally saw him so free, so indifferent, he thought that when he feel the end, he thought it would go away. It never goes away, but it goes away almost everyday. He, that was an everything once, is now an almost. An almost that don't let he be full in nothing, full of nothing, happy at all. He is nothing, just like Iker. But he did not want to see he being a nothing. He did not want to turn he into nothing. Iker can almost treat him like nothing. But then he almost give up, almost ignores everything, almost to, without any anxiety, end the day making sure that it is just another day with a last bit of almost and that a last bit of almost, one hour, turns to anything. But not turns to anything never. Iker almost doesn't love Sergio, almost. 

''Why is he not talking to me?'' Iker asked Marcelo and Cristiano one day. They looked at each other, ''Because you are blind.'' Marcelo said, and they left Iker there at the changing room, alone, thinking of what _''blind''_ means on him.

He literally stayed there for three hours after he notice that he just missed the training. When he was getting up , the door opened, and Sergio entered. When he sees Iker inside he immediately goes to the door, but Iker pulled him in. ''God, you don't have to go away just because i'm here.'' Sergio thinks a little, and enters in the changing room, going to as far possible of Iker he could go.

Iker was a little pissed of right now. He just wanted to understand why Sergio was not talking to him and why he was acting so strange. It was hurting him, he just wants to understand. So Iker goes to where Sergio is, he stays in front of him, staring at him while the other man was taking off his clothes, faster now that he saw Iker staring at him. ''I'm not blind.'' Iker says, like it was a statement. Sergio looked at Iker, surprise. ''I can see you very well.'' Iker finished his statement turning his eyes at Sergio's body, looking at every part of it. Sergio is blushing now.

''Okay...'' Sergio said and got into the shower quickly avoiding eye contact, but when he was almost in, turning on the shower, Iker pulled him, making Sergio look right in his eyes. ''Make me understand.''

Sergio was feeling so vulnerable, he was naked, in front of Iker, no that this was the first time, no it was not, they already saw each other naked so many times, but this one was different because they're not laughing or making small talk, they're really talking, taking the truth out of their bodies. It makes all the difference. Sergio was naked in front of the man he could not love, though he does. He missed Iker so much, in every match he almost goes at Iker to hug him, he almost kisses he on the cheeks, he almost calls him to come at his house to drink a beer and talk shit, he almost tell him about how Little Sergio loves that cartoon where a boy and a dog are best friends. Sergio almost tells Iker everyday that he loves him. Sergio feels dead inside, and he didn't think he could reach Iker's lips with his own, but he did. The kiss was not quickly, or messy, it was a nice kiss. Their lips fits well together, and so does their tongues, like it was normal, like if they do this everyday, like it was home.

Sergio stopped the kiss, looked at Iker and nodded his head, feeling sad, tears in his eyes, packing his things and putting his clothes back on his body, he soon was no longer in Iker's view. When Iker looked at him, he was already closing the door, leaving Iker alone, disbelieve at how much blind he was. He was feeling sad, because he didn't know, he just did not know. How could he not know? He should have know, he should have saw, that Sergio liked him, that he really liked him, so Iker would not have to feel ashamed of feeling the same thing for Sergio.

Sergio was feeding his son when someone knocked on the door, he already knew who was behind the door, of course, it was Iker. He opened the door and he saw a sad Iker waiting impatiently.

''Hi.''

Sergio nodded. ''I can't do this right now, I'm feeding my son.'' Iker's eyes get bright when he heard it. ''Can I see him? Please, I miss him.'' _He misses you too._ Sergio thought. He could send him away saying '' _no, you can't see him,''_  but Sergio has a heart so soft and fool, that all he could do was give space so Iker could pass and go to where Little Sergio was in the kitchen.

It was unbelievable how happy his son feel when he is with Iker. Sergio could not stop smiling at what he was seeing. Iker was feeding the baby, saying how much he missed him, and how much uncle Iker loves him. After he finishes feeding him, he put the baby on the couch and turned on the tv in a cartoon.

''You know, you could have told me.'' Iker was looking at Sergio, with tears in his eyes, but he was not sure if the tears were sad ones or relief ones. ''It's not easy.'' Sergio said in a low voice, looking at everywhere, but Iker. ''Yeah, I know, I guess that if it was easy I would have told you a long time ago.'' Iker smiled weakly, coming very close to where Sergio was. Sergio smiled too. ''We are so stupids.'' In this time, Iker was the one who kissed first, the kiss was warm, and it was home, it was love, and it was familiar. They didn't say anything, because they didn't have to. They already know, they always knew, just like everybody knows. They belong to each other and they are home.

The kisses on the cheeks became kisses on the lips, and the hugs happen more frequently, and they always sits side by side, and Iker does not have to go at Sergio's house to help him take care of his son because Sergio's house became his house too. And no one asked, no one talked, because they already knew. They're home. 

**Author's Note:**

> english is not my first language so i'm sorry for the mistakes


End file.
